Church Signs

by Ed Zapp
(Louisville, KY)

SIGNS OUTSIDE CHURCHES

* You are not too bad to come in. You are not too good to stay out.

* Come in and let us prepare you for your finals.

* A miser is a rich pauper.

* Ask about our pray-as-you-go plan.

* We hold sit-in demonstrations every Sunday.

* No matter how much you nurse a grudge it won't get better.

* Start living to beat hell.

* If some people lived up to their ideals they would be stooping.

* Everything you always wanted to know about heaven and hell but were afraid to ask.

* Pray up in advance.

* At an Arizona church in August You think it's hot HERE?

* I was going to waste, but Jesus recycled me.

* K-mart is not the only saving place.

*** And, my all-time favorite:
DO YOU KNOW WHAT HELL REALLY IS? - COME EARLY AND HEAR OUR ORGANIST

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