Family Conflict

by Femi
(Chicago. IL)

This is a very good place for people like me, looking for where to hide and share my ordeal with.

Shortly after taking over as the senior pastor of a growing church, we had a serious conflict with my wife which resulted in me hitting my wife. The police were called and the board was notified. My wife left and my leaders at the headquarters came and still want me to stay while they are trying to mend things with my wife. I felt like I have lost all that I have and it is very difficult for me to concentrate. I am still in the church and my wife (family)is in another state. She is keeping me at bay and we hardly talk. Things had not been the same since and I felt like quiting all the time.

Comments for Family Conflict

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by: Anonymous

Your wife comes first. Your first ministry is at home. God is your supplier, the church board could turn on you at any moment. Request time to work on your marriage, deal with your rage. You need counseling because your anger is out of control. I would assume that was not the first time you struck her. The problem is deeply rooted in you, spousal abuse in the church is a real problem. I speak in love, maybe no one has said this to you but your behavior will continue and only escalate if you do not get to the root of your anger. I'll pray for you and your family. Remember your wife comes before the church. Work on your marriage,

Be strong

HItting Your Wife
by: Liz Levesque

Dear Pastor,

Stay in counseling at your church. Get help. I don't know what to tell you about your wife. What you posted was difficult. In my experience your wife is probably too ashamed of what you did to return to that church. She probably can't or won't show her face around there again. Which leaves you in a conundrum, your marriage and relocate or stay at the church?? If I were you I would try to patch it up with my wife at the expense of my church job. You can always get another church job pastoring but you can't get another wife and family. This is my $.02. Wife and family come first in my book. Pastoring second.

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