I Am about to Quit!

by Jay

I was raised in the home of a Pastor. My dad has been very successful everywhere he has served. Although I knew somewhat about the hardships of ministry, he and my mother did a very good job of trying to cover my brother and I from the pain of ministry. I myself have been in full time ministry for 6 years. I had the opportunity a couple years back to join his staff. What started out as a Joy has become a breaking point for he and I both. We both are questioning quitting and he is doing so after 25 years of full time ministry. A prominent family of our community joined the church he has been at for over a decade about 6 years ago and they seem to have brought death with them, they have money and they use that for their selfish gain. They have manipulated people and they are vicious with their secret gossip and attacks. This combined with a lack of appreciation and a lack of respect for our hard work and our production have sent us reeling in pain. And to hear my father say "son, there are those like them everywhere, even in our past and growth there, that's just people." If that's people I think I am done putting myself on a sacrificial altar to be killed by people. I need prayer and guidance I am about to give it up guys....

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Dear Brother:

I hope you are still checking in. I hope you see this. Quitting the pastorate does not make you a quitter although you can "feel" this way and others can DUMP Scriptures on you. Even Jesus 'could do no miracles here" and I daresay, neither can you, in such an atmosphere of moral corruption, spiritual decay, as such this family brings, with their money, and Romanesque type power. It kills everything. One cannot sustain such a ministry. I have been bullied out and forced out by powerful rich people before. Know what happened after I left? They lost their riches! I hope you are somewhere healthy and happy. Blessings and prayers+

You have a right to joy in your life and living
by: Anonymous

Dear Brother,

the healthiest thing you can do is have a joyful and loving life. If this "job" in the church is so bad then why not find a profession that makes you the necessary income you need and also gives you the respect from others the Lord wants you to have. I don't know why there is so much disrespect in these churches, so much jockeying for position, but people with money, can, either be a great blessing to the congregation or they can use their money and power for destruction. Which sounds like your case. I pastored for 25 years and saw it all. This stuff is so awful. I never lasted long around this kind of stuff. I always moved on. In the end, this kind of stuff usually caused a church split. Been through quite a few of those as certain people "took over" and no one challenged them cause they had money. Go do something happy and joyful with your life. Don't waste 25 years like I did. elizabeth+

Strength needed
by: Paddy Venner

HI there. Really sad to hear your story. Without knowing any more than what you have said, it sounds to me like the work of a Jezebel Spirit, which I have had to confront in my church, and I have asked people to leave. You and your dad seem to have identified the problem, so why not confront it. People might leave, but Jezebels can only operate when there's an Ahab leading. Ahabs allow the spirit to move because they shy away and don't confront. For your church to grow some people will leave, and some people must! We asked a couple to leave, and our church grew from that day. the Jezebel spirit first gains favour with others then attacks the leader. I have done a lot of teaching on the subject and would be keen to help you through this. This is not the end. This will not end in destruction, but if you stand up to it and uproot it, you will grow in character and the church will be better off. have you not got any denominational leadership to back you up? Stand firm mate!

Try this resource
by: Cathy Gates (Renewingtheflame.com)

Unfortunately churches can attract people who have character issues that can be very destructive to the ministry and those in leadership. And, this type of person can contribute significantly to the risk of burnout. There can be varying degrees of characteristics. Depending on what you are seeing will help determine how to handle those individuals. The best resource I have come across has some very good advice in handling what the author calls 'antagonists' in the church. It is a book titled "Antagonists in the Church" by Kenneth Haugk. May God bless you and protect you as you deal with this very challenging situation.

1st Persevere Then...
by: Dr. Karl

There's no doubt ministry is plagued by more anxiety than just a few years ago. Cultural restlessness, distracted lives and the ease of e-sabotage are broad topics that often have specific and harmful impact. The "new normal economy" invisibly permeates ministry decisions. Weak leaders unwilling to stand up or stand against the spiritually immature implicitly invite more of the same. Essentially, getting fed up on any one day is understandable, almost anticipated in today's clergy life-cycle.

Perhaps you should quit, only your your spouse and the Lord will have the insight necessary to determine that.

But having said that - I have the greatest confidence you shouldn't quit NOW. Persevering...walking through the anxiety is character building and spirit strengthening. I'm not saying stay in it for the fight or what you'll learn. I'm not trying to toss placating bones your way or give you an atta boy for fighting through it. I'm simply saying, you can have your own ironic justice by getting through this current phase, learning to manage yourself through it - and then - in calmer waters have prayer and conversation about what might be next, and when. It's God's irony that their immaturity provides you opportunity to mature. It's God's promise in Romans 5.3-4.
Dr. Karl

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