Should I Leave My Church?

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Should I Leave My Church?

(USA)

I am discouraged, hurting, burned out, tired out, and stressed out. I am what this site talks about - pastor burnout. But even more than that, I am tempted to sin in ways I never thought I was vulnerable. I am afraid that I am going to fail my church, my wife, my children, and my God.

Is there anyone else out there struggling with similar things? Can you offer some advice or at least let me know that I'm not alone?

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Should I Leave My Church?

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Tempted to Sin
by: Anonymous

Dear Brother,

i can only assume that 'tempted to sin' means you are thinking of having a sexual affair. Don't do this. think of your wife. your children. Get out of this church. it is death. your symptoms are those of someone who is mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually dying. go and get some health. I have been in churches which had the label "Christian" but were just mortuaries in disguise. Go find life and love again with the wife of your youth and your children and family. There is really no shame in leaving a place which has caused so much death and destruction to you. This is obviously not a place of light,health, love and peace so why would you stay in such a place, logically speaking? run. run away now. save yourself and your marriage. Elizabeth+

Reach out!
by: D.W.O.

My friend, as has already been said, find someone you can talk to -- at the deepest levels. Another pastor, someone here, a pastor's coach or counselor. I left the pastorate in March pushing the edge of burnout, knowing, as a friend told me, that God's desire for me (not suggesting it's His for you!) was to exit in some health, with a positive outlook, ready for the next season of life, not -- as might have happened -- sick, sinful, broken mentally, angry and despairing. I took his advice and immediately sought new healthy relationships with some men who could minister to me and allow me to minister alongside them, without major responsibility. Now working at becoming a Life Coach and I see the Son shining again!

"escapist" behaviors common to burnout
by: Anonymous

The temptations you are facing are what can be called escapist behaviors that are common to burnout. It is like trying to find a "pleasure hit" that will take away the pain of burnout. But we both know that kind of approach only gives momentary relief and a whole lot of grief follows. If you begin to address the underlying cause - things will improve but it takes time. Seek medical advice, a good counselor, and like Elijah - sleep, eat a healthy diet and allow others to minister to you.

First Manage Yourself Well.com
by: Karl Galik

At this point, thank God there are no easy solutions or exit points. At this point thank God you for the new slightly angled course you're about to start. A 1% shift in direction now puts you in a whole new place 3 months, 6 months, 1 year from now.
1.) Rest. Sorry, I wish there was something more profound to begin with, but there isn't. If there's no renewal, no place for replenishment, no place for those rhythms and cycles, there's no place to turn around...
2.) Recognize care for self is directly linked to care for your mission. It's not a interruption in your mission, it is your mission. "...and the second is like it, love your neighbor as yourself..." -- Jesus, Matthew 22.39 (7x from Leviticus to James)
3.) Find intimacy. Physical, emotional intimacy with your spouse; trusted kinship with friends. Isolation is the number one enemy. Ask the small wildebeest calf separated from the heard.
4.) Learn to see the whole picture, think systemically. Creation has been designed to respond to your personal changes. Over-functioning and it's first cousin, over-responsibility only seem rewarding. They, like tobacco supply only a momentary hit before they begin to take your breath away.

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Should I Leave My Church?

Comments for Should I Leave My Church?

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Should I Leave My Church?