The Liberal Baptist Church
I applied online to a very small church in the inner city this last year. They were very small, nice people, and had a pastor for over 18 years who taught heresy, abused them, and made way more then he should have.
Walking in I knew there would be issues, but over time it became clear that the pastor was not the only problem, the people were. Someone got saved, and good things happened but all the leaders hated the bible being preached and were offended by many things I said. I was 27 when I got hired.
I fixed my tone and some style issues in my preaching but at the final 4 on 1 meeting (1 man, 3 women) it was made clear that the issue was content of sermons, not just style or tone. As in, we don't want the bible preached verse by verse- they also wanted me to begin meeting with women one on one to disciple them, which as a single person (or even if I were married) would not be appropriate.
After this meeting and meeting with the denomination, I resigned and left on good terms. There was a lot to process but everything came crashing down a few weeks later.
The pastors in our denom are supportive and there are other options available. I have been faithful and the other pastors have been awesome.
But in all honesty I don't feel like attending a church let alone going back to the pastorate at this point. I don't think I can leave the battle for good as I am a bible teacher but I need more time. I am super over-sensitive right now and have nothing good to say.
Lots of self medicating and loneliness right now, not to mention financial problems coming soon (this was the most I ever made at a job and now I am back to my group home job).
Anyway, the church will probably be disfellowshipped as it is pretty much a united church with a baptist name. I forgave the people and am not even super bitter but I am sad and very numb. There is a lot to process and I don't really know how I feel. Feeling like I was on trial every week in front of the 20 people there was no fun.
On the bright side, I am reading the bible more and recovering slowly. I just don't know how many churches I can be kicked out of/asked to leave/leave on bad terms.
I did my best here and it still was not good enough
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